The Truth About Vibrators

Last week, I tweeted some tips for reaching orgasm more quickly for women and the brilliant Joan Price pointed out that I left vibrators off the list. Considering the fact that almost all of my clients love their battery-operated toys, it really was quite an oversight! This omission coupled with a recent discussion I had with a passionate women’s group in Mexico prompted me to write this piece on vibrators and their role the bedroom.

When it comes to sex toys, there is a lot of misinformation out there, so I’m keen to set the record straight by addressing some of the most common vibrator myths I come across in my practice...

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Myth: Vibrators are for single ladies.

Fact: While I can totally envision an awesome ad for the latest and greatest vibrator choreographed to Beyonce’s hit single (how cute would dancing vibrators be?), married women actually report higher rates of use than singles (60 vs. 30 percent). Given that women who use vibrators also report...

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Is Shopping Together Good For Your Sex Life?

Researchers claim that shopping can be just as exciting as sex, as stumbling upon a great deal causes a powerful endorphin rush that rivals sexual arousal. Seriously?

A dispassionate shopper, I am reluctant to buy the theory that that a hot deal can leave you overcome with climactic excitement. I adore my sky-high heels and appreciate their role in the bedroom, but I cannot imagine getting that worked up in the mall.

Shopping expert, Tamika Auwai of Shop Socials sees things differently and invited me to attend her sold-out event, TEN, at the Spoke Club to observe the connection between intimacy and shopping in the flesh. This cocktail-friendly experience included some of the hottest designers in Canada and I was immediately taken aback by the number of couples who attended hand-in-hand. Perhaps it was the exclusive venue or the melange of booze and design, but the event was packed and love was in the air.

Guests were eager to explain the connection between shopping and intimacy and...

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New Ways To Get The Mission(ary) Accomplished: Tips To Spice Up This Classic Position

Oh the missionary position! Typically described as “man-on-top and woman-on-bottom, this classic go to configuration is one that many couples have engaged in over the years. As legend has it, this position found its name from Christian missionaries because they believed this position to be the right, and only way, to have sexual intercourse.

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The missionary position is prized for its level of intimacy because of how close you can be with your partner. It lends itself to intense eye contact, passionate kissing and low impact thrusting. But if you’ve grown tired of the standard missionary, try out one of these variations.

A Tight Squeeze

Ladies: once your partner is inside, both of you keep your legs together. Move your pelvis so it is slightly below his and have him give you deep thrusts and rock against your mons pubis. The increased tightness from your legs being together will feel great to him, and because you are positioned slightly below his pelvis,...

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Why Women Lose Interest In Sex...And What We Can Do About It

“I’d rather eat chocolate.”

“I just don’t care for it. It’s more of a hassle.”

“I want to be in the mood, but it just doesn’t happen anymore.”

Do you ever wonder what happened to your libido? Are you in an otherwise happy relationship in which the sexual tension seems to have vanished and you’d like to get it back? You are not alone! Losing interest in sex is actually quite common for women of all ages and while our reasons for becoming uninterested are varied, there are some common themes that emerge in our highly personal stories.

Read on to uncover some of the top reasons women lose interest in sex and explore practical strategies for getting your sexual groove back.

Performance Pressure

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Sex is supposed to be an experience, not a performance. If we could shift it back toward the former, the bulk of our sexual challenges would be easily resolved. Unfortunately, our obsession with sex as an indicator of...

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3 Ways To Seduce Your Woman

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What do all great lovers have in common? They are masters of seduction and they know it. Confidence may be key to seducing your lover, but you can also pick up a few tips and tricks along the way to keep her coming back for more. Try out these seduction approaches and let us know how it goes!

Compliment Her

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You want to have sex with her, right? Then tell her! Let her know that she is the object of your desire and ply her with compliments. Telling her that she looks good won’t suffice. You need to seduce her by describing in detail everything you like about her. Think about all five senses and compliment glow of her skin, the scent of her hair, the taste of her lips, the beauty of her curves and the sweet sound of her breath. Be an animal and let her know just how badly you want to get between her legs…and cater to her every need.

Be Aggressive

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Sometimes a poke in the backside or a half-hearted “Wanna do it?” just won’t...

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Gateway Sexual Activities

When Tennessee passed their new Gateway Sexual Activity law, I laughed out loud. Surely, this was a joke, right? The Onion had somehow gotten control of…. NO? They were serious! It is written right into their laws that hand-holding has to be taught as a “gateway sexual activity” in sex ed classes in public schools. Hand holding is now pre-sex, and banned in schools. Which is going to be regrettable when people start posting photos of all those GOP politicians holding their children’s hands. Or when all those sweet pre-schoolers with hands holding that big long rope get classified as pre-BDSM.

What the hell is a Gateway Sexual Activity? Something that will eventually lead to sex, maybe? Like adolescence? Eyesight? Birth?

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Here’s the thing about sex: Everything about us is sexual. Our sexuality isn’t this little thing that is neatly partitioned in one little aspect of our beings that can be brought out just now and then like a holiday elf...

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Abstinence and Accidents: The Sexual History of Corn Flakes

About The Author

Dr. Megan Stubbs Dr. Megan Stubbs is a Grand Rapids-based Sexologist. She holds a doctor of education in Human Sexuality from San Francisco’s Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality and a degree in Biology from Grand Valley State University. She also Board Certified by the American College of Sexologists (ACS).

 

For those who may not know me, Michigan is my home state. Despite not being a large state, we still are home to many companies that are based in our pleasant peninsula. In addition to being the automotive capital of the country, we are host to the global headquarters of the Kellogg Company, the producers and inventors of corn flakes. Now as innocuous as this breakfast cereal may seem, its history is one that is filled with ulterior motives and lucky breaks.

According to the Seventh-day Adventist Church, which incidentally has its origins in Battle Creek as well, a low fat vegetarian diet is recommended as per their teachings. Church member John...

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The Best Hand-Job Tip Ever

Last weekend, I had the pleasure of exhibiting and speaking at The Everything To Do With Sex Show in Toronto. Over 45 000 guests passed through the doors of this action-packed trade show and more than 5000 singles and couples attended my seminars on oral sex. I could not believe the turnout! Apparently fellatio and cunnilingus are hot topics and people arrived in droves to learn the “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Vagina” and “The Goddess” techniques alongside a few hundred of their closest acquaintances. It was quite the rush to stand on the stage in front of such a large crowd of eager and enthusiastic students. Now, it is my pleasure to share my favourite money-move with you, my loyal readers.

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The Goddess hand-job technique is a sure-fire way to finish him off and leave him aching for more of you, you and only you! It’s super easy and can be adapted to suit a range of positions of scenarios. Try it out tonight and let me know how it...

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Dirty Talk Lines You Can Use Tonight!

In my last post, we covered the basics of dirty talk and they are well worth reviewing if you missed them. As promised, I’ve listed some specific dirty talk lines you can use to woo, taunt, tease or tantalize your sweetie without feeling embarrassed or tongue-tied.

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Romantic and Sweet:
•You’re everything I’ve ever dreamed of.
•I can’t imagine making love to anyone else.
•You’re my dream guy.
•I never want any other c*ck inside of me.

Alluring and Teasing:
•I know you want what’s under this shirt.
•Want to come play with me?
•Make my thighs wet!
•I’ll do whatever you tell me to do.

Aggressive:
•I’m going to hold you down and make you cum.
•Can you handle what I’m about to do?

Responsive:
•Tell me how you like it.
•What can I do for you?
•I’m just going to lay back and let you work me over.

Ego Stroking:
•You’re the best I’ve ever had....

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How To Talk Dirty: Part 2

Continued from Part 1...

If you want to take it up a notch, consider telling your partners about the fantasies you have that include them. Tell them that you thought of them earlier in the day and started aching to feel their touch or tell them that you saw someone else checking them out and it turned you on. You might tell them that you were watching them work, bend over or get undressed and it made you tingle in all the right places.

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Be honest with regard to your fantasies and remember that fantasies do not need to become reality. Just because you are willing to talk about filming your sexual escapades because it turns you on while you are having sex does not mean that you need to pursue this fantasy in real life. If you find that you are turned on by talking about a fantasy, but draw the line at talk alone, make this clear in advance. It is important to set boundaries before sex play and debrief after sex to discuss how you feel about the things that were said.

Other...

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